Sunday, February 22, 2009
Scrabble Feud
The only real disagreement Jon and I have ever had that we actually held a grudge about and were sulky and quiet for the remainder of the evening was four years ago over a game of scrabble. Jon brought up the game for the first time since a few nights ago and we hesitantly agreed on the rules we would play by and the dictionary we would use. It is permanently retired for the sake of our marriage now. As you can see from the picture it didn't take long before we were fighting. Jon cheats.
Keeping the Boys Happy
Since I have discovered my enjoyment of baking, bread making and cooking I have found that the boys in my life are getting happier as my skill is impoving... all you need is a little of this...a little of this and a little of that and I am a popular lady! I am finding that love goes right from the male mouth into the heart so I will continue to do my best to deliver!
A Taste Of Spring
Last week most of our snow melted. It was a hopeful week. One that reminded us that if we can just stand the dark mornings, numb fingers and white ground for another couple of months spring is just around the corner...as they say. Ben loves the outdoors but hates the cold so on this plus degree day he welcomed the oppertunity to run around on the mostly clear deck for over an hour. With no toys out there he did nothing but enjoy the chance to be outdoors. It's coming Ben...I promise!!
Back To Work
Blankie and "Ottal"
Ben has some vices. I feel it is a small window of opportunity that one's world is made right again with a full bottle soft blanket and open arms. Some of my favorite times of the day consist of this combination. Others may look on and think I am babying him by letting him suck on a bottle all day and carry around a blanket all day Linus style but I don't think it is something to make issue with. He does love that "ottal" though. I put one ounce of rice milk in it and seven ounces of water so he is not filling up on milk nor is he rotting his teeth. I have to say from a parenting standpoint it is nice to have a "crutch" sometimes to fall back on. If Ben is sick, tired, or cranky his blanky and bottle are a quick fix. When he is two they will be limited to his bed and when he is three the bottle fairy comes to our house and brings his bottles to the new babies while Ben gets some new big boy toys in their place...his blanky though he can take to university with him for all I care.
Grammie recently crocheted Ben a beautiful soft new blankie- the prerequisite is that his blankies are white and crocheted so it fit the bill and he happily drags it around.
the War Rages On...
In light of Ben's anaphylaxis diagnosis I have put on my Warrior Mother armour plenty of times to stand up for Ben's rights and safety. I am not under the illusion that I am anywhere near finished so I took an opportunity to vent a little of my feeling on the subject to a Mr. Gardner of the Ottawa citizen for a very offensive, misguided and one sided article written on anaphylaxis called "Why we need to stop treating nuts as toxic waste" This obviously struck a nerve and I couldn't keep my mouth shut about it...or more accurately my fingers still.
HE SAID....
Anyone with kids in elementary schools knows what the No. 1 killer of children is. It is peanuts.
Or at least one would think so, given the astonishing efforts schools are making to keep peanuts -- or nuts of any kind -- from contaminating classrooms.
Entire schools are declared nut free. Some have banned home-baked goods, or any food without labels that can prove they are untainted. Signs at entrances warn that nuts are contraband on the premises and ask visitors to wash their hands lest a few molecules of that morning's nut-bearing breakfast contaminate the sterile environment.
Nicholas Christakis, a physician and professor of medical sociology at Harvard University, has personal experience with nut alerts. At the school his children attend, a peanut was recently spotted on the floor of a bus. The children were rushed off as if anthrax had been discovered, and the bus was decontaminated.
This is all ridiculous, Christakis argued in an editorial published recently in the British Medical Journal. Nut allergies are real but the risk doesn't justify anything like these sorts of reactions. Worse, by treating nuts as if they are weapons of mass destruction, schools and other institutions promote false perceptions of the risk that cause needless anxiety and might actually make the problem of allergies worse.
"All told in the United States," Christakis says on the phone from Massachusetts, "about 150 people die each year from food allergies, all food allergies combined. That's children and adults."
Every death is a tragedy but that number has to be kept in perspective.
"A hundred people die from lightning strikes," Christakis says. "Fifty people die each year from bee stings. But we don't remove flowers from schools or playgrounds."
Meanwhile, "45,000 Americans die in motor vehicle accidents. More people die being walked or driven to school than die of nuts. And yet we don't close schools because they're a threat to children."
And then there's the sports children play at school. There are "10,000 hospitalizations each year from children suffering traumatic brain injuries acquired during athletics. And yet we don't see calls to ban athletics from schools."
There's nothing really unusual in this. Psychologists who study risk perception have found countless examples of tiny risks we worry about and substantial risks we don't.
Typically, though, our misperceptions don't have serious consequences. Most people worry more about air travel than they do about the drive to the airport, although the drive is usually the greater risk, but this seldom changes people's behaviour and so it doesn't really matter.
Not so nutophobia. "We are actually causing more harm than good with these responses," says Christakis.
By treating nuts like anthrax, schools "feed an epidemic of anxiety. And this epidemic leads to kids being tested and all kinds of minor allergies being detected." Growing numbers of kids labelled "allergic" leads to even more stringent anti-nut measures, in schools and elsewhere. That adds to the anxiety, which leads to more testing, and so on.
This sort of feedback loop can be found wherever there is disproportionate fear. I documented many of them in my book. Fears of school violence after the Columbine massacre led school officials and the media to look for any hint of student violence, which resulted in a stream of stories, and even more fear of school violence. The same thing happened in the panic over flying truck tires in 1997. And on a far greater scale after the 9/11 attacks.
But this particular feedback loop has a unique element. Children who are not exposed to nuts become more sensitive to them, Christakis explains. "So we're causing the very epidemic we're trying to stop."
This is not to say there is no risk. "Nut allergies definitely exist," Christakis emphasizes. "They can be very serious and life-threatening. It's just that we have overreacted."
There is no evidence that sweeping bans do anything for the safety of children that more modest interventions don't, Christakis argues. What should be done for the few students with serious allergies "depends on the circumstances. It needs to be targeted to ages. Two-year-olds share food and it's hard to stop them. Six-year-olds can be told not to. So nut-free tables would be reasonable. Making sure teachers know that a kid has an allergy is important. Making sure the epi-pen is available. Talking to the children about how to avoid exposure. There are a variety of things that can be done but the kinds of reactions we are seeing are extreme."
.Incidentally, the No. 1 killer of children is motor-vehicle crashes. Kids are actually quite safe in school, with or without nut bans. It's getting them there and back that deserves a little more of our attention.
I SAID
In response to "Why we shouldn't treat nuts like they're toxic waste...you
saw this coming!
I read with saddeness and outrage your article. I am generally very good at
seeing both sides of an issue (albeit I am biased with this one)! I don't
feel you portrayed both sides of this one at all. I didn't see the side of
the anaphylactic child. You did not give canadian stats, talk about the
risks with epi pens and minimized unfairly an issue that is currently
getting worse not better.
I would never send my son to school with a loaded gun for show and tell. If he were to play with it chances are that he could seriously wound seven children and one would die. These are actually the same odds if I were to send him to school with a peanut butter sandwich. It is my son however that could die.
When Ben was seven months old a dog licked his face at a breeding kennel just before we left. Five minutes down the road Ben began developing hives, hundreds all over his face and neck, he turned blood red and his throat and mouth began to swell. I stared in horror at this child who I would do anything to save, helpless to do anything. Miraculously an ambulance was able to meet us on the highway and Ben would be fine. I however would never be the same again.
We went to an allergist that month and discovered Ben had anaphylactic allergies to tree nuts, peanuts and eggs. The dog who licked him had consume nuts shortly before. Since that day I have viewed the world differently. I wash down shopping carts, read the oils on hand lotions, call ahead to restaurants, cook our food from scratch, never leave home without at least two epi pens and antihistamine and we dread his first day of school. We are responsible for our son’s allergy. We do not expect others to understand it to the depth that they must to keep him safe and although this is a life threatening condition we are grateful that it is 100% preventable.
When I read articles like the one printed in the Ottawa Citizen I fill with fear once again. I am dumbfounded that someone would insinuate that my son’s life is not worth an inconvenience.
“Only”150 deaths a year was the statistic quoted for deaths attributed to anaphylaxis each year in the United States. Perhaps this number is lower then it would have been because of the precautions the author labels extreme. For a parent of a child with this condition however this number feels too high. To the parents of these people that are included in the statistic I would imagine that to them their child was much more then “only one”.
00
Is it really inconvenient to ask parents to not bring an item to school that could harm a portion of children at the school and even prove lethal for a couple? Can’t you put nuts in the school in the same category as guns, knives and poison, because the effects are potentially the same?
If my son in third grade had to sit away from his friends at lunch at an “allergen free” table like the author suggested that would be his last day of public school. Can you imagine anything worse to an eight year old boy then to sit away from the others and be automatically labelled “different”. I am sure this would do wonders for his self esteem and self image. I am once again shocked that common sense tells you this is a more reasonable solution then asking the other children to switch their peanut butter cookie for an apple. Keeping food away from these children is not keeping them safe anyhow as so much of the school supplies are shared. My son may return to class only to borrow a pencil from a boy who just ate a peanut butter sandwich and through cross contamination have a reaction. His epi pen could misfire, be injected incorrectly and an ambulance could be too late. You will think I am being overly dramatic when I suggest that he could die in minutes right there on the classroom floor. The fact is however that this reality is not much of a stretch and it was one hundred percent avoidable. By keeping the schools safer for all the children and asking children to make a (small) sacrifice for the sake of another child may even teach them some compassion and acceptance in the process. It may send the message that everyone matters equally and we make allowances and support for those whose needs are different.
Do I think that evacuating a bus in hysterics and disinfecting it because a lone nut was found on the floor was an over the top reaction. Of course I do. This was an isolated incidence and the majority of attitudes are made up of a quiet awareness. Even when schools are guaranteed nut free, parents of allergic children know they are only as safe as one mistake. I would hope my son is prepared for the worst regardless and do not teach him to have a false sense of security. It is however a decrease in risk every time another nut product is NOT brought into the school.
The argument that avoiding nut products heightens the risk of allergies developing is unfounded, considering we are talking about schools specifically. We are not asking that all nut products be banned completely, only that they are kept out of public schools were all children have the right to attend without fearing for their lives. There are twenty one meals to be consumed each week. Only five of these occur during school hours. Your child will have plenty of opportunity then to consume nut products.
Benjamin didn’t ask to be born this way and we didn’t do anything to cause it. He is otherwise a happy, funny, intelligent and well liked child who deserves every chance available to him. We are teaching him to be responsible for himself and a condition that shouldn’t be treated as a disability. We don’t expect others to make unrealistic accommodations for him but we do expect that he can be safe in school. In light of how many more children are being diagnosed with anaphylaxis it would seem that I speak for more and more parents of children with this condition that now more then ever we need to be doing more not less for in order to keep them safe until a vaccine is available. The most poignant argument remains that my child’s right to live supersedes your child’s right to eat a sandwich.
Jennifer Neeb
THEN HE SAYS
Ms. Neeb,
I've received many emails like yours. With due respect, they are all based
on a misreading of what I wrote -- I absolutely did not say that mere
inconvenience outweighs the risks to allergic children, or any of the
similarly vile thoughts attributed to me.
What I said is that the risks must first be accurately understood and then,
in devising protective measures, we must beware exaggerated responses
because these, too, can inflict harm. Reasonable people can disagree about
what the outcome of that investigation should be. But I don't think there's
anything unreasonable in looking at the problem this way. And I don't think
there's any cause to accuse someone who does look at the problem this way
of not valuing every child's life. That's simply unfair and untrue.
Dan Gardner
SO I SAY
Mr. gardner,
Thank you for taking the time to read my letter. I did not mean to imply
that I believe you do not value the lives of all children, only that the
position you are taking in your article could lead some to read it this way.
I am included in this but would give you the benefit of the doubt since your
writing ability would lead me to conclude you are in fact a thinking,
feeling adult of intelligence who would not publicly write that the safety
measures put in place to protect children with allergies are too extreme.
You must admit however that perhaps if you are receiving many emails
challenging your viewpoint and suggestions, that you did not successfully
write your point as intended. If you lived for one day with a child with
allergies as severe as sensitive as mine has you would be grateful for any
ounce of prevention and support received in order to breath a tiny bit
easier. So some people freaked out a bus... at least they are being careful.
I would hope that you would consider the other side a little more thoroughly
next time you write on such a charged topic.
Thank you again for entertaining my rant.
Jennifer
THEN HE SAYS
Ms. Neeb,
You're right that if many people take a column a certain way, it may have been poorly written. But not this time. What people did repeatedly is read in the sorts of attitudes they have previously encountered -- people who really do see no reason why they should suffer even mild inconvenience for the safety of others. I understand their frustration, but as I say, that attitude is not my own.
Dan Gardner
...IT WOULD SEEM IT IS MY TURN...
HE SAID....
Anyone with kids in elementary schools knows what the No. 1 killer of children is. It is peanuts.
Or at least one would think so, given the astonishing efforts schools are making to keep peanuts -- or nuts of any kind -- from contaminating classrooms.
Entire schools are declared nut free. Some have banned home-baked goods, or any food without labels that can prove they are untainted. Signs at entrances warn that nuts are contraband on the premises and ask visitors to wash their hands lest a few molecules of that morning's nut-bearing breakfast contaminate the sterile environment.
Nicholas Christakis, a physician and professor of medical sociology at Harvard University, has personal experience with nut alerts. At the school his children attend, a peanut was recently spotted on the floor of a bus. The children were rushed off as if anthrax had been discovered, and the bus was decontaminated.
This is all ridiculous, Christakis argued in an editorial published recently in the British Medical Journal. Nut allergies are real but the risk doesn't justify anything like these sorts of reactions. Worse, by treating nuts as if they are weapons of mass destruction, schools and other institutions promote false perceptions of the risk that cause needless anxiety and might actually make the problem of allergies worse.
"All told in the United States," Christakis says on the phone from Massachusetts, "about 150 people die each year from food allergies, all food allergies combined. That's children and adults."
Every death is a tragedy but that number has to be kept in perspective.
"A hundred people die from lightning strikes," Christakis says. "Fifty people die each year from bee stings. But we don't remove flowers from schools or playgrounds."
Meanwhile, "45,000 Americans die in motor vehicle accidents. More people die being walked or driven to school than die of nuts. And yet we don't close schools because they're a threat to children."
And then there's the sports children play at school. There are "10,000 hospitalizations each year from children suffering traumatic brain injuries acquired during athletics. And yet we don't see calls to ban athletics from schools."
There's nothing really unusual in this. Psychologists who study risk perception have found countless examples of tiny risks we worry about and substantial risks we don't.
Typically, though, our misperceptions don't have serious consequences. Most people worry more about air travel than they do about the drive to the airport, although the drive is usually the greater risk, but this seldom changes people's behaviour and so it doesn't really matter.
Not so nutophobia. "We are actually causing more harm than good with these responses," says Christakis.
By treating nuts like anthrax, schools "feed an epidemic of anxiety. And this epidemic leads to kids being tested and all kinds of minor allergies being detected." Growing numbers of kids labelled "allergic" leads to even more stringent anti-nut measures, in schools and elsewhere. That adds to the anxiety, which leads to more testing, and so on.
This sort of feedback loop can be found wherever there is disproportionate fear. I documented many of them in my book. Fears of school violence after the Columbine massacre led school officials and the media to look for any hint of student violence, which resulted in a stream of stories, and even more fear of school violence. The same thing happened in the panic over flying truck tires in 1997. And on a far greater scale after the 9/11 attacks.
But this particular feedback loop has a unique element. Children who are not exposed to nuts become more sensitive to them, Christakis explains. "So we're causing the very epidemic we're trying to stop."
This is not to say there is no risk. "Nut allergies definitely exist," Christakis emphasizes. "They can be very serious and life-threatening. It's just that we have overreacted."
There is no evidence that sweeping bans do anything for the safety of children that more modest interventions don't, Christakis argues. What should be done for the few students with serious allergies "depends on the circumstances. It needs to be targeted to ages. Two-year-olds share food and it's hard to stop them. Six-year-olds can be told not to. So nut-free tables would be reasonable. Making sure teachers know that a kid has an allergy is important. Making sure the epi-pen is available. Talking to the children about how to avoid exposure. There are a variety of things that can be done but the kinds of reactions we are seeing are extreme."
.Incidentally, the No. 1 killer of children is motor-vehicle crashes. Kids are actually quite safe in school, with or without nut bans. It's getting them there and back that deserves a little more of our attention.
I SAID
In response to "Why we shouldn't treat nuts like they're toxic waste...you
saw this coming!
I read with saddeness and outrage your article. I am generally very good at
seeing both sides of an issue (albeit I am biased with this one)! I don't
feel you portrayed both sides of this one at all. I didn't see the side of
the anaphylactic child. You did not give canadian stats, talk about the
risks with epi pens and minimized unfairly an issue that is currently
getting worse not better.
I would never send my son to school with a loaded gun for show and tell. If he were to play with it chances are that he could seriously wound seven children and one would die. These are actually the same odds if I were to send him to school with a peanut butter sandwich. It is my son however that could die.
When Ben was seven months old a dog licked his face at a breeding kennel just before we left. Five minutes down the road Ben began developing hives, hundreds all over his face and neck, he turned blood red and his throat and mouth began to swell. I stared in horror at this child who I would do anything to save, helpless to do anything. Miraculously an ambulance was able to meet us on the highway and Ben would be fine. I however would never be the same again.
We went to an allergist that month and discovered Ben had anaphylactic allergies to tree nuts, peanuts and eggs. The dog who licked him had consume nuts shortly before. Since that day I have viewed the world differently. I wash down shopping carts, read the oils on hand lotions, call ahead to restaurants, cook our food from scratch, never leave home without at least two epi pens and antihistamine and we dread his first day of school. We are responsible for our son’s allergy. We do not expect others to understand it to the depth that they must to keep him safe and although this is a life threatening condition we are grateful that it is 100% preventable.
When I read articles like the one printed in the Ottawa Citizen I fill with fear once again. I am dumbfounded that someone would insinuate that my son’s life is not worth an inconvenience.
“Only”150 deaths a year was the statistic quoted for deaths attributed to anaphylaxis each year in the United States. Perhaps this number is lower then it would have been because of the precautions the author labels extreme. For a parent of a child with this condition however this number feels too high. To the parents of these people that are included in the statistic I would imagine that to them their child was much more then “only one”.
00
Is it really inconvenient to ask parents to not bring an item to school that could harm a portion of children at the school and even prove lethal for a couple? Can’t you put nuts in the school in the same category as guns, knives and poison, because the effects are potentially the same?
If my son in third grade had to sit away from his friends at lunch at an “allergen free” table like the author suggested that would be his last day of public school. Can you imagine anything worse to an eight year old boy then to sit away from the others and be automatically labelled “different”. I am sure this would do wonders for his self esteem and self image. I am once again shocked that common sense tells you this is a more reasonable solution then asking the other children to switch their peanut butter cookie for an apple. Keeping food away from these children is not keeping them safe anyhow as so much of the school supplies are shared. My son may return to class only to borrow a pencil from a boy who just ate a peanut butter sandwich and through cross contamination have a reaction. His epi pen could misfire, be injected incorrectly and an ambulance could be too late. You will think I am being overly dramatic when I suggest that he could die in minutes right there on the classroom floor. The fact is however that this reality is not much of a stretch and it was one hundred percent avoidable. By keeping the schools safer for all the children and asking children to make a (small) sacrifice for the sake of another child may even teach them some compassion and acceptance in the process. It may send the message that everyone matters equally and we make allowances and support for those whose needs are different.
Do I think that evacuating a bus in hysterics and disinfecting it because a lone nut was found on the floor was an over the top reaction. Of course I do. This was an isolated incidence and the majority of attitudes are made up of a quiet awareness. Even when schools are guaranteed nut free, parents of allergic children know they are only as safe as one mistake. I would hope my son is prepared for the worst regardless and do not teach him to have a false sense of security. It is however a decrease in risk every time another nut product is NOT brought into the school.
The argument that avoiding nut products heightens the risk of allergies developing is unfounded, considering we are talking about schools specifically. We are not asking that all nut products be banned completely, only that they are kept out of public schools were all children have the right to attend without fearing for their lives. There are twenty one meals to be consumed each week. Only five of these occur during school hours. Your child will have plenty of opportunity then to consume nut products.
Benjamin didn’t ask to be born this way and we didn’t do anything to cause it. He is otherwise a happy, funny, intelligent and well liked child who deserves every chance available to him. We are teaching him to be responsible for himself and a condition that shouldn’t be treated as a disability. We don’t expect others to make unrealistic accommodations for him but we do expect that he can be safe in school. In light of how many more children are being diagnosed with anaphylaxis it would seem that I speak for more and more parents of children with this condition that now more then ever we need to be doing more not less for in order to keep them safe until a vaccine is available. The most poignant argument remains that my child’s right to live supersedes your child’s right to eat a sandwich.
Jennifer Neeb
THEN HE SAYS
Ms. Neeb,
I've received many emails like yours. With due respect, they are all based
on a misreading of what I wrote -- I absolutely did not say that mere
inconvenience outweighs the risks to allergic children, or any of the
similarly vile thoughts attributed to me.
What I said is that the risks must first be accurately understood and then,
in devising protective measures, we must beware exaggerated responses
because these, too, can inflict harm. Reasonable people can disagree about
what the outcome of that investigation should be. But I don't think there's
anything unreasonable in looking at the problem this way. And I don't think
there's any cause to accuse someone who does look at the problem this way
of not valuing every child's life. That's simply unfair and untrue.
Dan Gardner
SO I SAY
Mr. gardner,
Thank you for taking the time to read my letter. I did not mean to imply
that I believe you do not value the lives of all children, only that the
position you are taking in your article could lead some to read it this way.
I am included in this but would give you the benefit of the doubt since your
writing ability would lead me to conclude you are in fact a thinking,
feeling adult of intelligence who would not publicly write that the safety
measures put in place to protect children with allergies are too extreme.
You must admit however that perhaps if you are receiving many emails
challenging your viewpoint and suggestions, that you did not successfully
write your point as intended. If you lived for one day with a child with
allergies as severe as sensitive as mine has you would be grateful for any
ounce of prevention and support received in order to breath a tiny bit
easier. So some people freaked out a bus... at least they are being careful.
I would hope that you would consider the other side a little more thoroughly
next time you write on such a charged topic.
Thank you again for entertaining my rant.
Jennifer
THEN HE SAYS
Ms. Neeb,
You're right that if many people take a column a certain way, it may have been poorly written. But not this time. What people did repeatedly is read in the sorts of attitudes they have previously encountered -- people who really do see no reason why they should suffer even mild inconvenience for the safety of others. I understand their frustration, but as I say, that attitude is not my own.
Dan Gardner
...IT WOULD SEEM IT IS MY TURN...
Happy Half Birthday Ben!!!
Ben turned eighteen months today! The difference in six months is the difference between baby and boy! I know now that exciting stuff is not in the rolling and the crawling it is in the development of the person. This last six months has really given us a glimpse of who Benjamin Alexander is and he is a lot of something! One person said there sure is a lot of "Ben" in him isn't there? I would have to agree that sums it up perfectly. Ben is a goof- he will start dancing spontaneously to music only he can hear, he will shout, laugh and cry in the same minute. He knows exactly what he wants to do, wear, say and eat all you need to do is get out of his way. He is extremely loving and gives great bear hugs and sweet pursed lip kisses. He is extremely ticklish and quick to laugh. He is so bright and understands everything spoken to him. He loves books more then anything else, is very sensitive, and has a lot of intensity about him. Wow I love this kid. He delights me everyday and I am so proud of him I can hardly stand it. I am once again anticipating an exciting year of getting to know more of Ben.
Benjamin, you are our gift, blessing and greatest joy!
I love every inch of you and every moment of being your "Mammieee"
Thursday, February 19, 2009
And They Said It was a Thankless Job!
This morning Ben had a quick bath (from the same mess that required a new set of bedding...joy). After I cut his nails he turned around, smiled and said "Thank you Mommy".
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
It's Official!
We just received word today that Auntie Jenn is a go! I received an excited phone call from my Best Best this afternoon to tell me that she would be flattered. We are so excited to have a real live Godmother in our family!
I didn't post a picture of her because she has kindly asked that I use a better/updated picture of her for publicity purposes. I obliged of course (not someone I want to PO).
I told her among the requirements previously listed Ben would probably like to receive his own mail ( she lives in Calgary) when he gets exited about things like that...I would let her know when. If someone else has a great Godmother in their life and has some suggestions please feel free to leave suggestions in the comment section as I am sure she is eager to get ideas. She has plans to visit this summer though!
Thanks for being our Godmother Auntie Jenn!
I didn't post a picture of her because she has kindly asked that I use a better/updated picture of her for publicity purposes. I obliged of course (not someone I want to PO).
I told her among the requirements previously listed Ben would probably like to receive his own mail ( she lives in Calgary) when he gets exited about things like that...I would let her know when. If someone else has a great Godmother in their life and has some suggestions please feel free to leave suggestions in the comment section as I am sure she is eager to get ideas. She has plans to visit this summer though!
Thanks for being our Godmother Auntie Jenn!
Sunday, February 15, 2009
A Hole in our Home
Love Feast 2009
Valentines Day is a nice holiday if you skip all the flowers, chocolates and overpriced card crap. It's not that I am not a romantic but I want a little more originality then Halmark dictates. We do love themed things all day and I make Jon's favorite cupcakes and dinner. When Ben is a little older we will have heart shaped pancakes for breakfast and heart pizza for dinner. Jon and I exchange small tokens of love rather then gifts. This year he got me a ring box with a sweet little note in it...he also bought me one of those expensive cards with a popout that I am so against. I was sort of flattered though that I was worth the trip to the card store and the $6.95 piece of paper.
Ben seems to be a fan of this simple holiday as you can see from his heart cookie and "kiss" on his head. I have let up on my no sugar but for twice a year rule when we were at a little girls birthday yesterday and Ben couldn't have cake (not because I was being mean but because it had egg in it, another one of his serious allergies). He was visibly feeling left out as he watched everyone else devour the strawberry iced princess cake. I felt terrible that I didn't pack him up one of the egg free cupcakes I had made for Jon (I only made them without eggs to see if they would turn out that way with substitute). Bad Mom. So to compensate when we got home I let him have REAL cookies...with sprinkles and everything (as you can see from the nudie cookie, he licked the sprinkles off first...Atta Boy!). His God Mother elect will be happy to hear that I am loosening up a bit I would imagine.
Saturday, February 14, 2009
A Day At the Beach
One Day Jon and I packed up and went to the beech for a week. We didn't have any plans at all. That is the best way to go anywhere, otherwise you might miss out on what could happen.
The first thing we did was go to M&M meats and buy a tub of chocolate, chocolate fudge chunk ice cream. It is the best. We ate the whole thing in one sitting. We did this for seven days straight.
The next day we sat on the beach from sun up until sun down.
We bought blow up floating toys and floated for the morning. Then we gave them to some little kids. When I was eating a sandwich from the picnic we brought for lunch a seagul took it right out of my hand. Sweet Jon gave me the rest of his. I don't even really like sandwiches, but I love Sweet Jon. In the afternoon we read and talked. Jon Napped ( I don't really like to nap either). In the evening Jon threw sand at me so I would chase him. I did and then we watched the sun set.
It was a great day.
Friday, February 13, 2009
Dear Summer
Dear Summer,
I really miss you. It feels like it has been to long since I've seen you and I am starting to forget what you are like.
I vaguely remember laying in your warm sun, walking through grass in bare feet, barbecuing with friends on the deck, going to the park and playing at the splash pad with a slippery baby. I kind of remember sandy beaches, dripping ice cream cones, the smell of sunscreen, the convenience of flip flops, bike rides through trails, walks in the evening, lounging by the pool. I wish I could eat buttery corn on the cob and strawberry shortcake with biscuits and real whip cream right now and watch Ben play in his sandbox and then get muddy in his waiting pool. I wish the ducks from our pond and bunny's from our garden would come home. Summer, please come back soon!
Love, a pasty white and cold fan
Ben's Godmother
There is something magical about a Godmother (thanks Disney). It is nice to have a younger sort of grandparent-esque person in your life that is really just suppose to love you and hope you parents don't die. The modern Godparent doesn't really have to do much. Should we prematurly kick the bucket you really only have to hang around long enough to make sure he gets to our parent's house and then peek in on him every so often to make sure they are being nice to him and say really nice things about us to him. In the meantime you just let him occupy a special spot in your heart reserved for god children and let him call you "Auntie Jenn". I wouldn't want Ben to miss out on this Godparent experiance so I would like to formally ask my all- time- best -life- long- into- eternity- friend Jenn to be Ben's God Mother. You are my first choice for this important role becuase I know that you already think he is wonderful...that is very important. You will make sure he never looks geeky, you are not afraid to talk about anything, you have the same name is me, you have a great sense of humor, you will feed him better then I do, you are sweet and kind and know his mom better then anyone. If you choose to accept I thought I would write a few things down that you should know...
1- Ben likes everything to be kissed no matter how lightly he banged or bumped even a minor part of his body. Often he won't even look up from what he is doing but continue playing with one hand while he holds the other in the air to wait for a kiss before it can resume. If you don't know what he is expecting I am not sure he will use it again.
2- He drinks goats milk- it smells like shoes but he likes it and it is better for him than dairy.
3- He does not eat sugar except for super special occasions like Jesus' birthday and his own. That is about it.
4-He likes to have his nap in his pajamas and get a new outfit upon waking.
5- He is addicted to his bottle- I don't make issue with it because he is so spectacular otherwise I wouldn't want to make him feel bad for being a bit of a baby in this respect. I figure it is a small window of life that a bottle of rice milk mixed with water mixed with goats milk makes everything in your world perfect.
6- He poops alot.
7- He sleeps with a crochet blanket over his face. He will not sleep if this is not drapped over his head.
8- "JamJams" are Pajamas, "cookies" are bran bites, "candy" is blueberry's and "footsies" are toes.
9- He had oatmeal pancakes and berries every morning for breakfast I make them from scratch but don't worry there is about 50 in the freezer...he won't eat anything else.
10- He loves music and prefers to dance to loud irish music and great big sea.
Will you be his Godmother- circle one...YES NO
LOVE YOU!!!!!!!
***This invitation was inspired by another blogger (Nie Nie) who made a blog plea of her own for a godmother...feel free to use this medium to attract a Godmother of your own!
To My Valentine
Dear Jon...
Do you remember the poem that I wrote you when we were both snowed in at our respective houses and couldn't get to one another before we were married? It was all the things I love about...You! In the last three years, I have added more to the love pot!
I love your hair, your eyes, your lips. I love your patience, your bum in jeans and one day (only one!)of face scruff. I love the way you know just when I need you to hold my hand and how you scrape and start my car in the morning. I love that you try to understand me even though I know I often make you nuts. I love your biggness and your perfect smile. I love that you pray with me. I love that we make gorgeous babies. I love that you love Nascar even though I hate it. I love that even though you don't get Europe, you will take me there one day. I love that you eat what I make you without complaint, and for that you will never have to eat salmon again. I love your work ethic, you dedication and your intelligence. I love that Ben has you for a father. I love listening to you play with him and watching his eyes light up when you come through the door. I love that I trust you completely and I fit into your hugs perfectly. I love that we have never fought about anything ever, never raised our voices in anger and never called one another a name we couldn't take back. I love that when you look at me I feel beautiful and we think the same things are funny. I love that you accept how different we are and find that interesting. I love that you wrote me private vows on our wedding night and how you've kept every single one of them. I love that you let me do it my way and always put your family before yourself. I love that you will be embarrassed that I wrote this on my blog. I love...you!
xoxoxoxoxoxooxoxxo
Smooshie
Sometimes I call Ben Smooshie, because when I look at him I just want to smoosh him and eat him...although that wouldn't be very appropriate, so I just nibble on his toes occasionally.
I know I haven't been posting pictures recently because I have been on a sort of camera strike. Over Christmas Jon and I went out and did something totally impulsive and unlike ourselves. We bought a $1300 camera. My dream is to one day own a beautiful camera such as the one I had in my hands and proudly carried out the door of future shop ( I also dream to live in Europe, publish a novel and make enough money to wear new socks everyday). Jon and I were so excited all the way home about that camera we bought with Money we didn't have until we got home and looked at each other. "We can't keep it can we?" We both shook our heads slowly as reality set in. "But we can hold it for a while right?" and we did. Getting out my little silver $150.00 number didn't have quite the same appeal after that but Ben is growing like a weed so I got over myself and snapped a few new pictures of Smooshie.
Yes I realize already that his hair is adorable...it came to be quite by accident. Usually I brush it down after his bath and smooth it to one side in "good little boy" fashion. One night I did not..and it poofed right up in the air. I realized I was repressing who he is...he is not a "good little boy" with flat hair...he is a rascal monkey with crazy hair...Be true to you Smooshie!(yes I add a little gel to get him through nap...)
Thursday, February 12, 2009
The Sweetest Word
Yesturday Ben looked at me and said very clearly "Mumm-y" This was the first time I had heard this and it instantly brought me to tears. He grinned at his obvious achomplishment and has been using this new praise worthy word a lot since. My heart puffs up a bit each time I hear his sweet little voice carefully wrap his tongue around the new word that means so much. I am so happy I get to be his "Mumm-y".
A-Da
As I write this Ben and I are waiting for J to come come from work. I know he is coming home for five o clock which leaves the minutes leading up to very long. We have a great little routine we follow every day depending on the day of the week it is but the hour between four and five is left unfilled while I try to find things to do to pass the time. Sometimes we dance, usually we read, soon we will go on walks outside. Always we wait. The sound of the garage door opening and the car door slamming perks up both our ears and J opens the door to a squeel of A-Daaaaaaaaa! from Ben. I try to contain my excitment so he doesn't think I am a geek...but inside I am running arms outstretched as well. J sets down all his stuff where I don't like it but knows he is instantly forgiven because he was so missed and all is right again in the world when our little family is together again at the end of the day.
Monday, February 9, 2009
No I Didn't!
We were leaving preschool this morning and as always I loaded Ben into his carseat, put my bag beside him on the floor of the van and tossed my keys into the front seat so I would have two free hands to put the stroller away with. I closed Ben's door and walked around to the trunk to open it...locked. I went to the front door to get my keys to unlock it...locked. When I threw the keys on the front seat it must have pressed the lock button on the key fab, unbenownst to me of course! If you want to instantly feel your stomach turn over on itself...just lock your baby in the car. It was pretty sickening. I called over a friend to watch him (already crying) while I ran back in to call Jon and sheepishly admit what I had done (while all the other moms who would NEVER do such a thing overheard. Jon was there in under 30 minutes but it was a pretty long thirty minutes while Ben screamed his head off in the van mad at me for just staring at him through the glass (peek a boo got old after about 2 minutes!). Had this taken place a few months later I really would have caused a commotion in the parking lot when I had to smash in a back window. In the thirty minutes it took Jon to get there the van would have been too hot to leave Ben in. So this is the first and only time this year when I will say "Thank goodness it is winter!"
Friday, February 6, 2009
Poor Ben
A lot of posts have been entitled "poor Ben" I realize but here we go again...
Ben had a fever for four days when we took him to the doctor who suspected a lung infection. I took him for x rays and blood work then yesterday and picked the wrong time of day to go. I didn't think that early in the morning everyone would be there because they were fasting and on their way to work. We sat down with all the other people in the lab waiting room and waited our turn. Fortunately I brought his bottle and a snack. I gave Ben some grapes after he drank his bottle (he didn't have to fast..) and as he breathed in deeply to cough he inhaled a grape into his airway. Fortunately my first aid training kicked in and when he looked at me terrified and unable to make any noise I quickly put him over my arm and baby hymlicked him. The grape flew out and he proceeded to throw up all over the floor in front of 40 wide eyed onlookers. I was shaking of course from too much adrenaline too early in the morning. I am so glad I have taken CPR courses and kept them updated so I did know what to do immediately. Of course we were right above the urgent care center so if I had froze help wasn't far away.
Ben had a fever for four days when we took him to the doctor who suspected a lung infection. I took him for x rays and blood work then yesterday and picked the wrong time of day to go. I didn't think that early in the morning everyone would be there because they were fasting and on their way to work. We sat down with all the other people in the lab waiting room and waited our turn. Fortunately I brought his bottle and a snack. I gave Ben some grapes after he drank his bottle (he didn't have to fast..) and as he breathed in deeply to cough he inhaled a grape into his airway. Fortunately my first aid training kicked in and when he looked at me terrified and unable to make any noise I quickly put him over my arm and baby hymlicked him. The grape flew out and he proceeded to throw up all over the floor in front of 40 wide eyed onlookers. I was shaking of course from too much adrenaline too early in the morning. I am so glad I have taken CPR courses and kept them updated so I did know what to do immediately. Of course we were right above the urgent care center so if I had froze help wasn't far away.
On The Loose
12:00 noon is my crazy time of day- we get in from preschool most days at 11:30 and I am trying to get everything in the door and cranky, tired,hungry Ben in his highchair and fed so Jon knows to call me at 1:00 when Ben has his nap. On Monday Jon called at noon so I knew something must be wrong! He told me to lock the doors and not go out as soon as I picked up the phone...whoa! He explained that close to our house (just off our street actually) that morning when everyone in our neighbourhood was out shovelling snow, brushing off cars, going to work and walking to school someone was shot and killed. The killer was armed and still on the loose!
Let me explain that we bought our home where we did specifically because of the location. It is extremly safe and family oriented, one of the most popular in the city. We are within walking distance to everything and have lots of parks and schools close by. Having people murdered outside out front door is not what we signed up for so this was shocking to say the least. The swat team and police were patrolling the nieghbourhood and escorting children home from school after the lock down was over. Jon drives by this particular bus stop that she was found on every morning on his way to work and had he left any earlier would have seen her. When we listened to the news that night we found out that this woman was a volunteer at a vet office and manager at a local toy store, she was only 28 and was just married a year ago. Very tragic and the police have no suspects! We back onto conservation and woods and so Jon was right to be concerned as it is a good place to hide...Our doors are all deadbolted as I type... but I will certainly sleep better when he is caught!
Let me explain that we bought our home where we did specifically because of the location. It is extremly safe and family oriented, one of the most popular in the city. We are within walking distance to everything and have lots of parks and schools close by. Having people murdered outside out front door is not what we signed up for so this was shocking to say the least. The swat team and police were patrolling the nieghbourhood and escorting children home from school after the lock down was over. Jon drives by this particular bus stop that she was found on every morning on his way to work and had he left any earlier would have seen her. When we listened to the news that night we found out that this woman was a volunteer at a vet office and manager at a local toy store, she was only 28 and was just married a year ago. Very tragic and the police have no suspects! We back onto conservation and woods and so Jon was right to be concerned as it is a good place to hide...Our doors are all deadbolted as I type... but I will certainly sleep better when he is caught!
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