Ben is not a good night sleeper. The hours between 8pm and 8am are not his best hours, he is up 6 times a night to eat. I don't think he is actually hungry as much as he needs comforted back to sleep. This is not good for him or me, however its easier for me to just feed him until he is sleeping so I can hurry back to bed for another couple hours. I was surviving this until last week when he decided that after I finished nursing him and he had dozed off he did not want me to put him back in his bed but rather hold him all night. I would put him down and the moment the first hair on his head touched the mattress he would cry. I pick him back up and rock him back to sleep only to repeat the same ordeal. 5 times I did this two nights ago he just kept waking up and crying every time I put him down.
I wish I could hold him all night, I really do but this is not a reasonable expectation for him to have of me! I was feeling guilty but decided that this is just one of the many lessons he has to learn that is hard but good for him. We had no choice but to let him cry.
2 nights ago marked the first night. We had to follow through once we committed to this method because he would be confused as to why sometimes I would pick him up and other times not. The hardest thing I have done as his mother so far is change him, put pajamas on, read to him, nurse him, put him in bed and then ...let him cry himself to sleep. 40 long minutes later he was asleep and I almost went in to wake him up and make sure he didn't hate me! 2 hours later he was up again and I went, changed him, nursed him and put him back into bed and once again let him cry for another 40 minutes. 3 hours later we went through this again but he only cried for 15 min and he didn't wake up again!
Last night we put him to bed and let him cry for only 10 minutes and 2 hours later he didn't cry at all...and slept till morning!!!! SUCCESS! I feel like a different person this morning, my brain cells have stopped committing suicide and I can think clearly! I am also pretty positive Ben doesn't hate me or feel abandoned or traumatized. In fact he seems a lot happier this morning as well!